Good is good and bad is bad. I am not about to suggest all wrongs are equal, that cheating on an exam is as bad as murdering somebody, that watching an x-rated movie is as bad as rape, or that yelling at your spouse is as bad as beating them. What I do suggest is that all are bad. If you understand love you know if you choose to love you will do what is good for people, not what is bad. If one person is guilty of cheating and another is guilty of murder, it is in fact profoundly true that both have done wrong.

Yet no-one loves all their lives, everyone chooses to give in to temptations sometime, even if it means just a quick look at a sex magazine or telling a lie to stay out of trouble. It may seem "unfair" (though it really is not), but once done even the slightest wrong can never be undone. You cannot uncheat a test, unmurder a victim, take back an argument, undo an affair, etc., etc., etc. We have, each and every one of us, done wrong. From the moment we commit our first wrong, it is clear that we can never return to the state of having done no wrong. Since even newborn children will choose to do at least one wrong when given the opportunity, perhaps we can say that, with one or two exceptions (members of many religions believe that one or more people did no wrong during their lifetimes on earth), all of us are "wrongdoers" from the moment of birth.

We have said you can choose to love any time you want to. This is true no matter what you have done in the past, and only requires that you want to love now. If you decide to love, what can you do about your past? The only thing that can be done is that you can be forgiven for having not loved. If you understand love, you know that if you love someone you will forgive them the wrongs they have done to you. Think carefully about love and forgiveness, and you will understand that if you love someone you will always and repeatedly and truly forgive them for having not loved you. If you love someone you forgive them for everything they do to you and to other people (we discuss later the one exception to forgiveness).

The murderer who admits his wrong and asks forgiveness is perhaps better off than the cheat who denies he has done anything wrong and rejects any thoughts about needing forgiveness. If we have all done wrong, and if those who love forgive, should we not quit trying to keep score of each person's wrongs and merely forgive them when they ask for forgiveness? If you love people, you will forgive them.

Can, and should, we forgive someone who does not want our forgiveness? Perhaps it is true that we cannot forgive someone unless and until they seek our forgiveness, perhaps not. Perhaps we cannot forgive someone unless and until they are willing to accept our forgiveness, perhaps not. Yet whether or not someone must seek forgiveness before they can be forgiven, does not in any way alter the fact that we can love someone who is our enemy, who hates us, and who does not want to be forgiven. If you know and understand the love that is in your heart, mind, and soul, you know and understand that you can and should love those who are your enemy and who hate you.

It is clear that if someone loves you and seeks your forgiveness, you can and should love them, and out of that love you will forgive them. No matter how many times they may ask you to forgive them, if they seek your forgiveness and you love them, you will forgive them. If you have completed your search and know and understand love, you also know and understand that if someone is your enemy and hates you, you can and should love them. If you love those people who hate you, and who do not seek forgiveness, you will love them and do good to them, with the hope that they will choose to love you and seek forgiveness. You can and should love both those who love you and seek forgiveness, and those who hate you and do not seek forgiveness.

I am not saying that every person who seeks forgiveness is sincere, perhaps most are not. I am not suggesting that forgiving someone who has murdered means giving them a knife and gun. I am saying that if you love someone you will tell them about love, so they will want to love and will want forgiveness. If you understand love you know what it means to love both those who seek forgiveness, and to love those who hate you and do not want to be forgiven. To love those who hate you and who laugh at forgiveness is perhaps the greatest test of your desire to love.

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